Once I got the okay from my eye surgeon, I hurried into my studio and, of course, overdid it! The joy in getting back to painting has been the reward. I just tend to ignore the aches that go along with my excessive arm movements and having to haul big canvases around! I had prepared about a dozen canvases before needing to take a break for the surgery. So I was very eager for the attack. All went well, lots of paint, lots of ideas. Great!
But then, this morning I found I just didn’t know what to do. I almost sat there for about an hour, something I never do. I found little things to do in my studio, putter around a bit, occasionally glancing at the paintings, wondering what they had to tell me. I just didn’t know. Then I realized it was big decision time and I was not going to back away. I don’t want to keep repeating myself, taking the easy way, so it is now challenge time. I don’t need to throw away everything I’ve been doing until now. Just carry it further. Once I realized I was almost there, I was there. It was just giving myself permission to keep painting. Again.